Maybe it’s the fact I had a recent birthday.
Maybe it’s the fact I had a cheeky waitress
no older than 16 who had the audacity to tell me…
(This is embarrassing folks.) “My mom has that same purse!”
I have never wanted to punch a dumb bimbo more.
That wasn’t the end of it. As I was leaving she told me to
‘Have a goodnight ma’am!”
I almost threw my boneless buffalo wings up right there!
This isn’t the end of my what was adding up to
be a senior citizen night out.
I made the mistake of going to Satan’s playground.
Now I know you’re thinking Yankee stadium. It gets worse.
Wal-Mart.
As I hurried about to grab the few things
I need looking more like a hostage
than an evening shopper. I soon got to the self check out.
I prefer these as
they are usually quicker. I was on my last item
when a boy less than 5 years
younger than me came up to, well let’s say help.
(I’m using that pretty fast and loose.)
As he waddled toward me.
(I say waddled cause his pants being so low made
it impossible to walk like a normal person.)
I noticed a pair of glasses in his hand.
He held them up to me and stated in his squeaky not fully developed voice.
“I think you dropped your reading glasses ma’am”
I decided right there I was going to be
arrested for assault. There was no way around it.
As I took a deep breath in and clenched my fist, I just as quickly stopped.
If I hurt this “child” I would be obligated by law to help him.
Damn you nursing career! I knew you’d hurt me in the long run!
I simply smiled and walked fast.
I knew he wouldn’t be able to catch me.
I glanced over my shoulder and said loudly.
How’s it feel to be 14?
I low blow I know.
It was fun to say though because I knew he’d never understand it.
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